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12.8.12

The Brief Silence

I'm still here!

As I mentioned in my last post, there have been talks of big and exciting changes with our family. I have been wrestling with how much to share in this space. So, a brief explanation will suffice until things further develop. Sorry, it's not another baby, if you got excited about that being the news haha.

A few weeks back I posted about how I often forget that I work outside of the home, granted, the work I do is essentially the same work I would be doing at home, just at someone else's home. Bringing Julian with me was my main incentive to taking the job with the family I nanny for. I wanted to have the best of both worlds, and for a while it was.  I should have listened to my instincts when I began to feel the effects of exhaustion, taking care of one toddler is trying enough, none the less taking are of two! My drive to succeed was over riding my sense of well being, and when I was tired I just pushed though the day. Unfortunately, my dearest friend and husband was the one who ended up with the short end of the stick in the whole situation, his laundry was the last to be done and he rarely got the benefits of my creativity in the kitchen because it had been spent during the day or I was simply too tired. Now, don't get me wrong, he can very much so take care of himself and make him self something to eat, but I want to do those things for him, because I love him and it blesses him. When the new baby came, I thought I would be able to handle it all. I am not super woman, and frankly, that is ok. I give my highest regards and respect to those parents who have twins or multiples, and or several small children at once. This is indeed very difficult work, trying on your patience, physical stamina and logic. So, after much prayer and consideration, I put in my notice. Ending anything is difficult, when children are involved it only gets more complicated. Of course the family will be fine with out me, will find a suitable replacement who can devote 100% of their energy on the two darlings I have come to care so deeply for. It is a bit jarring though, as with any major change in life. I am excited to be able to spend more one on one time with Julian, and try to take better care of my husband.
There is surely more change in the works, very big and exciting news and projects that can be talked about when the time is right, but for now I'll just say we're terrified and excited in the same moment. There is a lot of work and sacrifice ahead of us but we are not going to let those fears hinder us from opportuni to better our lives.In the mean time, I have been knitting and sewing, lots of late night sewing, and kitchen tomfoolery as always, soon to be shared with you here. Thank you, for reading and for your patience.

- K

4 comments:

  1. So glad to see you part around these parts; these are big changes - and not easy to make. I really do think living our lives better/fuller/intentionally will inevitably require work and sacrifice of some fashion but I trust (and pray) this will be such a blessing to you and your family xx

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  2. aw, that is wonderful that you were able to realize what was best for your family and make the decision. i don't think you will have any regrets!

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    1. Thanks so much, It was a really hard decision for sure. I can not imagine how you manage all those boys! Major props to you!

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